Life is all about Having tears in the eyes and Putting a Smile besides at the same time

Life was on its peak, struggle was at hand, pain was in the heart, tears in eyes, with heavy foots I went walking, shouldering my responsibilities, bent with them, about to touch the lips of the ground, meaning was missing like words from lips, emotions from heart, abadoned dessert, somehow I thought, the battles I faught long ago, so far, dwelling in my courage. But the remaining footsteps I should walk can not be taken back. I went on with no direction, where life takes Me, where my destiny leads, where I will be with myself when no one will. Perhaps a darkness covered in lights of my soul, the soul which I lost in battles with my body, shaking hands shivering fingers, I would take everything out living inside me since I was born, I can not let it die inside, my anger, frustration love whatever it was, I just wanted to speak it out throw it out. I still wonder what if I wander, if I lost ever, will I be able to be back home. Will there be flowers or thorns I pierced in my heart, or some blood a sip of blood to drink my destiny. Millions of feelings I have for daily, it becomes impossible for me to differentiate between them, they have same faces with same cries, which emotion should I give justice to, I simply don’t know. But always I feel something, something that I can’t say speak express but feel, the way it is. The way life goes and the way It would be. I feel chocked suffocated but still I can breathe inhale, in hell.